Thursday, January 27, 2011

Raise optimistic and happy kids!!

Some kids are happy and cheerful naturally while most of them need to be trained to achieve a positive attitude. Well this behavioral approach of kids has huge amount of impact on their future life and on their personality. Like, one child with the habit of grumbling and blaming will be irritable and dejected most of the times. Whereas a child with happy disposition will have positive frame of mind and learn to take things in stride.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Make your child goal driven

Your child needs your encouragement and guidance at every phase of life. Surrounded with so many choices it is natural that he or she may get distracted and confused. At small age the child does not have the vision and goal for his life. But you can have! Your involvement and interest in the daily routine and life of your child can prove to be valuable for making him successful.

Having a goal to achieve drives a child to learn and perform better. The goal may be very simple and small like coloring a picture beautifully. The habit of setting goals and accomplishing them too will make the child develop skills faster. With each accomplishment the child will become more confident, self driven and happier.

Often a child gets distracted from his present activity and leaves the task unfinished. One after another unaccomplished activity makes him less happy and less confident. On the other hand, your initiative to teach how to set goals will bring interest and add liveliness to otherwise somber atmosphere. The child will participate actively and perform his best to achieve the goal.

While setting a goal for the child, it is important to understand the interest of the child. Devote undivided attention to the child so that he feels loved. Discuss with him on the issues that interests him. Ask him what he wants in life and listen to his talk uninterruptedly. Now assure him that how important he is to you and in the same way his goals. Encourage him to write down his goals on a paper and try to explore the ways with him to achieve those goals. The whole process of goal setting will bring the feeling of self worth, confidence and delight within the child.

It will be a good idea to put the goal setting paper on the board with further mentioning the small steps that can lead to goal accomplishment. With each completed sub-goal, put a tick mark against the step. Each fulfilled step will fill the heart of the child with pride and happiness. He would then be driven to complete the goal without losing the focus. Slowly goal setting and completion of task will become the habit of the child.
Avoid imposing your goals on the child. Let him follow his dreams. And whether the goal is achieved or not support him for his effort and sincerity. Beginning with small goals, get over to long term goals slowly. This will help the child to gain focus and control over his life.

The path of success begins with planning and goal setting. Teach your child the importance of goals and make him goal driven through various activities and exercises. The process may be slow but important for your child development.
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Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Appreciate your child often

Appreciation is the desire of every human being. Everybody wishes to be appreciated and acknowledged for their deeds. The same rule applies to children. A child is delighted and motivated if he or she is appreciated for good behavior or action. A genuine praise induces the child to continue the good deed.

Appreciation inculcates in child the difference between the right action and the wrong one. He or she then understands what kind of actions is expected from him or her. It also builds up the confidence and self esteem of the child. Simple words like “well done” makes the child happy and stimulated to do better. He or she will make effort to follow the right action in order to get attention and affection of the parents.

Most of the times, it is the behavior of the parents which may or may not trigger the child to do better or behave appropriately. Indifference on the part of parents lowers the self esteem of the latter. The child would then do everything (which you may not approve!) to seek the attention of his parents. Therefore it is better to pay attention to your child at the right time and acknowledge his efforts.

Garvit always keeps his books back in the shelf after reading them. It was not so before. But it was continuous attention and recognition of his parents for every good act that he developed this habit. Every time he keeps his things well in place he gets a hug with appreciation like, “you have done a great job, my dear.” These words proved to be magical for him and he repeats the right action.

Another way to appreciate a child is to provide his favorite thing if he achieves certain level. For example if he displays good social manners at a social gathering then he may be rewarded with his favorite chocolate. In case the child performs well in guitar classes, he can be rewarded with his favorite toy. All these are very small but effective motivational tools for children.

Appreciating other children for good behavior at times also inspires children to repeat the good action in order to get appreciation of their parents. Children wants love and for that they may go far to get it.

Parents may also adopt points system in which points are given for good action and points may be deducted for each unapproved act. The chart of the same may be placed on the wall for easy view. Against those points the child can be awarded some gift. This activity shall act as instant encouragement to the child to obtain the gift as well as appreciation from the parent.

Appreciation is the valuable method in building the character of a child. Reprimanding the child or neglecting his accomplishment can make him irresponsible and ill mannered. On the other hand, appreciation will definitely prove to be a beneficial tool for child development.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Forgive and forget your child’s mistakes

“To err is human and to forgive is divine.”

We have often heard this saying but practiced seldom. Mostly the mistake becomes too prominent in parent’s vision than the feeling with which the action is done. You must have observed children at many times try to behave like their parents and elders but end up making a mess. We as parents are too obsessed with fault finding that we tend to ignore the genuine effort made by the child to learn new things!

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Children deserves your quality time

Parents are the world of children. The life of children begins with parents and throughout life parents remain the most crucial aspect of their life. No matter how much the children get mingled in the society, the importance of parents and their valuable time for the children can never shrink.

The sight of mother brings tears of joy in the eyes of a baby. He is elated to see his mother and looks forward to stay around her all the time. In the same way, loving hug of father makes the child feel secure and safe. He needs both the parents to feel complete. The presence of both the parents boosts the confidence and enthusiasm of the child.

Imagine a young kid who is about to perform on the stage. His eyes search for his parents. The moment he traces them his eyes sparkle and he is motivated to do better. But the absence of parents disheartens the child and affects his self esteem. Lack of enough time or excessive monitoring both hampers the child development.

The kids who get proper attention of their parents grow up as more confident and emotionally secured adults. While those who do not get sufficient time and attention lack zest for life. But that does not mean one should leave all the work and other priorities of life behind. A child does not require 24 hours attention. All he or she requires is the quality time of parents.

Take time out to listen to him or her. A good conversation time or playtime fills happiness in the atmosphere. You must have heard that a family which eats together stays together. Share at least one meal time with your son or daughter. A light hearted talk at dinner table helps release stress levels and induce cheerful mood among the family members. Reading story together at bed time is yet another way to strengthen the parent child bonding.

Remember to fulfill your promises. Avoid making promises which you cannot fulfill at all. So if you have promised a visit to zoo at the weekend then try to make it possible. The times spend together will last long in the memory of the child and will bring the latter closer to the parents. In case of any unforeseen circumstance, assure the child that the promise will be fulfilled soon.

The child expects special treatment from his or her parents. He or she deserves it too but in optimum proportion. The purpose is to make him or her bloom with delight. Therefore make sure that you devote quality time to your child now onwards!

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Curiosity is the first step towards development

Curiosity is an obvious and healthy quality of a child. Every child tries to understand the things around his or her surroundings. A toddler picks up anything from the floor and tries to explore it. A small child opens up his brand new toy car to know what it contains although the action is not so appealing for his parents. On the other hand a growing kid throws a volley of questions to his or her parents regarding anything or everything. The parents often get annoyed with this type of attribute and sometimes snap kids for their inquisitive nature.

A child is new to this world. He does not understand many aspects and concepts of life. For balanced and all round growth of the child it is very important that he is exposed to various facts of life and gain knowledge about them. Parents are the first and lifetime teachers of the child. Through their eyes a child sees the world. By holding their hands, a child walks the path of education and development.

The inquisitive nature of a child is his first step towards development. That reflects his preparedness to learn new things. When a kid asks a question that means he or she is observing and responsive towards his or her environment. His or her curiosity should be patiently satiated. The parents should take out time for the child for conversation wherein the child should be motivated to speak up his doubts, questions and thoughts. Thereafter the parents should come up with appropriate reply.

Sometimes the parents feel short of time or tired to answer the spontaneous question asked by the child. At that moment he should be softly reassured that his curiosity will be answered soon. Inappropriate answers and rebuke should be avoided.

Kids should be made self sufficient to quench their curiosity levels. Gift them picture books, dictionary, encyclopedia, science based books wherein their questions will be answered and many new information will also be rendered. They should be exposed to various places and situations like zoo, museum, historical places, get to gathers, prayer meetings, worship places, parks, malls and such other places where they can gain knowledge.

Parenting is not a kid’s job. It requires active involvement and evolvement also. Before dismissing a question of your child, remind yourself that you are depriving your child an opportunity to grow and develop.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Be a kid yourself!

As a parent, we need to set an ideal example of good behavior and good habits. We have to be careful in our words and deeds. The children will automatically follow the path we tread on. However, it should be borne in minds that it is a gradual process of learning. The parents often expect kids to behave like adults. While this is not easy for kids, but it is easier for parents to be kids themselves and make learning process enjoyable.

A few days back, rains forced my seven year old son to stay indoors. Reluctantly, he obeyed and started watching cartoon. It is not an easy task to deviate him from his favorite pastime. Any ways I let him watch cartoon for half an hour and then cajoled him to play some game with me. Both of us had great time playing indoor games. Instead of behaving like an adult I enjoyed being a kid myself. Getting naughty and doing things in kids’ way is fun. During all this time, I overlooked the mess that was created. My son was surprised to see the change in his mother as there were no scoldings or directions to clear the mess.

At the end of the game both of us cleared the mess together and happily as well. Being kid taught me to be happy and cheerful without specific reason. The incident also taught my growing kid to make most of the available time and also to take good care of his things.

My child taught me to be patient and considerate while making him learn new lessons of life. You can also come forward and share your experiences in the journey of parenting.